Seth Singerman

Childhood Friend

BJ's Funeral Service - Cleveland, Ohio

January 6, 2006

Last week it would have been truly unimaginable that we would be all here today. After flying in from Chicago, I walked into my bedroom at my parents house last night. The first thing I see is a jersey from playing orange rec league football from when I was in second grade (BJ was on my team). On the shelf in my room is was a picture from Cedar Point of BJ and I dressed as rock stars when we were in middle school, a picture from my bar mitzvah, a picture from the super bowl, the world series, a picture from skiing, a picture of us from my 25th birthday. I remember laughing with BJ recently that when we were little we traded baseball cards, and then a year ago we led our respective companies to becoming partners on a multi-million dollar real estate deal.

It should be clear that BJ and his family have been a part of my life for as long as I can remember. In fact, the last time I was in this room, I was standing beside him after Gary tragically passed away. BJ’s last words to my fiancé Dana was about how long our friendship has lasted. He told Dana he assumed, he hoped, he would be standing up at my wedding (which of course he would have). BJ was such a special person that different middle schools, high schools, colleges, and cities never diminished our friendship.

I feel very fortunate to have spent time with BJ during his last days. We had dinner the night before New Years near his home. Literally, the topic of conversation was how great his life was going. We talked about his love of South Beach and how proud he was of his new home, we talked about his tremendous professional success and future ambitions, we talked about his kite surfing. We talked about Jane, his new niece, and as we talked about her, BJ’s face lit up and it was incredible how visible the tremendous love he had for her. Most importantly we talked about how happy he was. I looked at my fiancé and literally remember saying with a smile “Dana I said I love you but I want to live vicariously through BJ”.

Since BJ moved to Miami roughly three years ago it was extraordinary to see how all facets of his life came together so completely. Personally, he had recruited good friends to join in him Miami. He lived in any bachelors’ perfect setting, waking up in the mornings with the beach at his doorstep to go kite-surfing and a short walk or drive to the office. Professionally, BJ’s intelligence was always at the highest level, but it was truly exciting to see firsthand the respect he gained both within his company and broadly throughout his field. BJ was a sought after man – whether by his friends who just wanted to spend time with him or by companies that recognized he was a rising star.

Looking back at that night, I remember driving home across the causeway from Miami Beach and thinking how proud Gary would be for the strength BJ had exhibited to grow into the person he became.

The cornerstone of BJ’s positive outlook was love and warmth. His love of his family for June, Heather, Raleigh, Pat, Jane, Grandma Bee and everyone else was truly limitless. At his home a couple days ago, I picked up his camera to return it to the family; it was full of pictures of him holding Jane.

BJ had a genuine warmth and friendliness that extended far beyond just his family. It was obvious to everyone who knew him. It was evident is his ability to create such a diverse group of close friends from growing up, from Duke, London, New York, Miami and all over.

When I reflect back on BJ and what he meant to me, I thought about changing my concluding remarks because they may seem too canned or cliché. But I resolved to say what was my initial feelings, my feelings from the heart.

They say family is with you through thick or thin, good times or bad. If that is true , then BJ was the brother I never had.